I’ll start the post by explaining that these are photos from the past few months. I have been taking on the occasional assignment from Brava Magazine here in Madison, WI.

The road towards supporting myself with photography has by no means been easy. Work is sporadic. The hours can be weird. Then there’s weather. I am grateful for the little bit of work I do get. The thing I have been unable to escape is having a day job. It s a blessing and a curse. A stable and consistent paycheck is fantastic. Being tied to a schedule and an office is not.

I feel like I really should forge more connections and give freelancing a go, but there are so many reason that sounds like a huge gamble. One is family. I love my wife and kids and I need to be present for them. Working for yourself lumps a whole pile of new responsibilities and worries on you day to day existence. Shooting is a small fraction, and editing is not a huge task. That’s only a small slice of the time needed to make working for yourself work. Let’s not forget book keeping, marketing, consultations, ordering product, correspondence, and organization. When it comes down to it, none of this is even what I stuck out to do in the first place. I just wanted to make interesting work that said something about who I am and what I think people need to see. I haven’t done that in a while. Daily clutter gets in the way.

I don’t resent the work I do for pay. I get to meet people and collaborate with them to capture their personality. The thing I have been missing is personal projects. Exhibiting and getting published is a huge part of what I need to be doing. What’s the roadmap for all that business?

Maybe it’s time for a non art job. I have been hunting locally and regionally for my next gig. Photographer jobs are few and far between. That and I get the feeling I don’t have the chops in the eyes of a art director or hr department. 40 hours a week of completely unrelated work might be just the thing so I can get back to my own visual language – the whole reason I started in the first place.

We’ll see. I might be back here saying the exact opposite thing in a year or two. To some degree, I am weary of my prospects – Is this a cry for help?  Perhaps you should hire me for a project and ease my mind.